Thought for the Day
Experience is something you don’t get until just after you need it
Going Low 1
Unless you’re the sort of person who slows down to look at the scene of an accident in the hope of seeing a bit of blood, or still enjoy pulling the wings off butterflies, you will take no pleasure at the sight of Tiger Woods hacking it round like a high-handicapper, and being unable to find a fairway with GPS a compass and several guide dogs. Whenever great champions go into decline, no matter where they fit into your own list of personal favourites, it should arouse sympathy and I find myself averting my eyes, so as not to share the anguish a moment longer than necessary. The problems faced by Woods are too well-known to be regurgitated here but whatever your opinion on the circumstances that have led him to this nadir, you would need the heart of a stone, or banker, to not feel just a smidgeon of concern for his plight. He is clearly desperately unhappy and his one place of refuge, the only part of his life where he previously felt not only unassailable but where, perversely, he could exclude all outside influences and get on with what he does best, is now denied him. Being inside the ropes with his caddy was always his sanctuary and now even that, it seems, offers no solace. Let’s face it, his form is such that he couldn’t beat a fat man in a race to the bus stop.
Under these circumstances, and considering the way he is playing, it seems remarkable that the issue of whether or not he merits a captain’s pick for the Ryder Cup is even being discussed. Of course he doesn’t, and to suggest otherwise is to blindly ignore the mountain of available evidence, like some golfing creationist. There is having faith, and then there is wild-eyed, irrational refusal to take note of any proof, substantiation or confirmation that your belief may, in fact, be predicated on extremely unsound data.
And then, as if to confirm that the world really is in the grip of some bizarre, shared delusion, comes a press release this morning (Monday) reporting that bookmaker William Hill is offering Tiger at 10-1 for the US PGA Championship, which starts Thursday – on a course that demands long, straight driving above all other virtues. Right now I would imagine his odds of making the cut are about 40-1.
Big Girl’s Blouse
A few years ago, before Phil Mickelson made his breakthrough win in Majors at the 2004 US Masters, I nicknamed him Phyllis because it seemed that every time he was in contention for one of the Big Four, he would, like a big girl’s blouse, find ever more inventive (and dumb) ways to screw up. It was a monicker I was delighted to stop using but it may have to be resurrected in light of the big man’s continuing inability to put in the one performance needed to become world number 1. As in those distant pre-Major days, he plays as we know he can – which is sublimely – and then goes into meltdown just as the prize hoves into view. He looks like a nervous teenager who, having successfully negotiated every aspect of their practical driving test, crashes into a wall as they return to the test centre.
I do wish he would stop.
Going low 2
From being the near-unattainable holy grail of golf, the score of 59 is becoming almost commonplace. A few weeks ago Paul Goydos achieved the feat in the first round of the John Deere Classic (where he didn’t win, incidentally, but finished runner-up to Steve Stricker). His score was made over the TPC Deere Run course measuring 7,257 yards. Then, in the run-up to the Irish Open Graeme McDowell reported that during a practice round at his home track of Royal Portrush (albeit on the smaller Valley Course, at 6,203 yards) he also cracked to 60 barrier. And lest we forget, as recently as May, Japanese phenom Ryo Ishikawa went one better, with a 58. Then, course, just over a week ago week Stuart Appleby tamed the Old White Greenbriar Course, a par 70 of 7,020 yards by firing 59 on the last day to win.
The portents had been favourable, as the day before in the same event JB Holmes carded a 60 and fellow US Tour pro DA Points had a 61. As yet there has never been a 59 on the European Tour but the way things are going you might want to see what odds you could get on it happening before the end of this season – William Hill (I’m not being paid to mention them, I promise) is currently offering 25-1, which seems pretty good to me.
Quote of the week
Golf is a game invented by the same people who think music comes out of a bagpipe. Anon.